jabagawee

In North Korea, jeans are illegal. That is all.

5pm

Hey, I know. I can just forget about college. Just graduate high school and become a standup comedian. Yeah! That’s a great idea.

10pm

A Dream About Making Food

Whoa, this dream was heavily influenced by recent events in my life. I’ll note them as we go along. The characters today are my gramma, my aunt, me, and my dad.

So first my dad decides to make “rice sushi,” which turns out to be my in-dream name for what actually is 麻糬 (thanks Michelle for helping me figure out the name). (as a sidenote, me and mah sister were talking about 麻糬 a few days ago) He says very little rice is needed, so of course, we put it in very little rice. He climbs into a small cabinet (similar to how Emily crawled into that small cubby in VBI, wth) and starts to knead the dough. Next, I measure out a bunch of sugar and a little bit of salt to put into the dough. The measuring spoons are the same ones Marsha brought to registration club day (yeah again whoa!). Apparently I’m supposed to add a pinch of flour to the sugar and salt so that the kneading is less sticky. Or something.

Then I accidentally add another portion of salt and sugar, so my dad tells me to take it out. Luckily, the measuring cup thing (which looks more like the measuring cup in my Tide laundry detergent) was still covering the pile of salt and sugar, so I could pull it out of the cupboard nice and easy. Next, I go to the next room to make a call from my cell phone to someone. My gramma picks up. I’m pretty sure I didn’t call my gramma. Did I mention that this part of the dream is in third person view? I’m in another room watching myself make a phone call. Earlier it was in first person. When did it switch? I have no clue.

Back to first person. I put dem doughy chunks into the oven, and it instantly flares up. The flames originate from beneath the baking sheet, but there’s nothing flammable underneath it. I’m so confused. And plus, the dial is on Low. How could the Low setting of an oven cause instant combustion? 

Okay yeah, as you can sorta tell, the narrative style of the post was extremely weird. I felt like going sorta stream-of-consciousness and massive-amounts-of-rhetorical-questions. As a thought, I felt like this dream was extremely boring, because it was basically based on the last few weeks of my life (which means my subconscious is totally not being inventive) and the story was quite mundane.

12am

a long forgotten dream

This was from November 22, 2007, but I figured I might as well consolidate all my dreams into one spot.

Just woke up at like 7PST. Turned on computer and typed all this up with a little memory loss in dream recall here and there:

~dream recall break, forgot the first part~ The dream starts with me and a friend looking for another friend of ours. He got lost, big time - possibly kidnapping. We talk a bit and finally JJ’s dog finds his scent. I run out to JJ’s backyard, get stuck in some demoness’s minivan and go to her dimension. ~giant dream recall break~ Somehow I manage to get to Best Buy in the mall (there is no Best Buy at our mall in real life). ~mini dream recall break~ Some teacher DC is there. I believe in my dream that I had another dream before about the same teacher tormenting me. ~more breaks~ I start chasing after him. ~don’t remember exactly when I became lucid~ This time, because I remember my last dream, I am somewhat lucid, but still bound by the laws of physics. ~ugh i hate breaks~ He somehow jumps onto a super high shelf and uses it to run around the store. I jump too, way higher than in real life, but no where near high enough to get onto the shelf. Then, at the apex of my third jump, an unseen hand pushes my behind and propels me onto a shelf. I climb over the wall beside me to get onto the next aisle’s shelf, feeling the popcorn ceiling brush my back. He throws playing cards onto random shelves, hoping to cause me to slip. He starts using all the tricks from my last “dream”, whereupon i scream repeatedly: “THIS IS MY DREAM. I’M THE LUCID ONE HERE!” I keep ending up well behind him in our chase. Finally, he runs outside and gets into a car with a woman in the backseat. I run outside, thinking abut that rule where lucid dreams rarely change light levels - I am going from a poorly lit Best Buy out to the sunlight. I subconciously cause the car to crash into a wall. The woman gets out of the car and leaves my blubbering teacher there. Then a couple of my friends show up, one of them in the sitting part of a shopping cart (like where the children are supposed to sit). I tell them this is all a dream and that I’m lucid and prove it by flipping the shopping cart kid over my back - with much difficulty. Somehow, the gravity caused him to stay on my back for about 15 seconds. Then I talk to one of my female friends. Suddenly, i scratch my ear and realize that i did it in real life. My lucid dream quickly fades into nothingness.

I had a ton more breaks that I forgot to put down, but yea… For clarification, I never had the previous “dream”. I just thought I did.

10pm

I should really fix my sleep schedule

Otherwise I can’t remember any of my dreams for my dream journal!

4pm

Dreams are sometimes mundane

I brushed my teeth last night in my dream. With a manual toothbrush.

12pm

Why can’t I remember my dreams?

Oh right, because my mom woke me up by shaking me. Geez mom, lemme wake up on my own terms.

11am

Two dreams remembered out of three, not bad

Gah, I’ve had this post in tumblweed since this morning when I woke up, and I still haven’t posted it yet. I had three dreams last night, so let’s begin.

The first dream was at about 5:00am, and I’m pretty sure it was suitably epic. Unfortunately, I don’t remember it anymore. I blame myself for waking up at 5:30 and not bothering to commit the dream to memory.

The second dream was about Spongebob, of all things. In it, Squidward fell in love with this nerdy yellow fish named Penny. She was nasty. Then Squidward fell down with this rare affliction named jealousy disorder, where the body swells up and you vomit copious torrents of water. Penny, apparently, was already dating some other random fish dude, and this jealousy disease was an indicator to the world that Squidward was totally violating the sixth and ninth commandments (according to the Catholic way of counting commandments). Sooner or later, Spongebob comes down with an illness with similar symptoms, since sponge illnesses usually involve swelling and oversaturation with water anyways. Once Squidward gets better, everyone thinks that Spongebob likes Penny, but he fervently denies the fact. His gargantuan size, however, draws the attention of Penny, who would not have seen him if he were not so large (that’s what she said). She untwists herself and reveals that she was a sponge too all along. They then skip away in joy. At the end of the dream (episode?), a normal-sized Spongebob is sweeping the floor while a visibly angry and reswollen Squidward stands simmering.

And finally, the third dream! This one’s a doozy. It starts with a dancer, because that’s what my subconscious was thinking of. So the dancer is a very pretty girl. I don’t remember the details, but the one thing I remember was that her hair was slightly shorter than shoulder length. I’m a sucker for hair. :P

So anyways, dream girl and I eventually get engaged (shush, it’s a dream). We hold this giant party type thing in a concert type setting, but it’s more like the size of a high school auditorium. Girl dances and dances and dances, every move displayed on the giant screens overhead. As I sit in the front row and generally just amuse myself, I get pulled onstage in this “surprise” move. Of course, it’s all planned out, but hey, anything for a good show.

As I’m up there, I remember a “rival” family of mine. Apparently, in my dream, I managed to make myself a giant corporate empire or something similar. To preserve the façade of friendliness, I had invited a giant competitor and his family. From my vantage point of the raised stage, I see the head of the opposing family sporting a shotgun and a evil grin. And it’s like that draem type of thing, ya know? Where you just know something’s up. In this case, I just knew that Mr. Rival was readying up to shoot me.

Readying myself for battle, I call out to the audience to see who has a handgun. I have no clue where it was a good idea to loudly declare my plans in front of my opponent, but hey, that’s how dream logic works.

A little more shouting, and I get Solomon to watch the mean man very carefully for further signs of suspicious activity. Soon, I hear a crack, and the entire audience erupts into screaming. Turns out the plot was more widespread than I originally had thought, and there were agents planted throughout the hall waiting for a signal to kill everyone around them.

As I walk around surveying the damage, several scenes engrave themselves into my memory, and therefore my post-awakening memory. First, a woman cries out for help. In my dream, there are eight separate criterion to check for death, only one of which is needed for confirmation. The woman’s husband meets three of them, and I guffaw. Don’t ask why I guffaw. Just know that I do. Another man shows two of the signs.

The traitors and conspirators are bound and thrown in a small pile. The party proceeds as normal, and we all eat cake. As we eat cake, my dad notices that the villains of my dream pulled a Houdini on us and disappeared.

There is an evacuation of all the people in the hall, half calm and orderly and half panicked. An hour after the evacuation is completed, a large space laser cuts through the auditorium with a thick green laser.

The dreams end, I wake up, and the day begins. Wonderful.

11pm

New site!

It’s not up yet, but my goal is to get a working site up by the end of the year.

7pm

My mostly forgotten dream

Stuff was being taken apart. Like an orange. Or a baseball. Small circular stuff. There was Solomon. More exciting stuff happened. I woke up at 5 with the most amazing dream in my head, and then I woke up at 10 and it was all gone…

7pm